1. For not replying to your text invites to hang out.
2. For not being there to calm your nerves.
3. For not being there to talk to you when you needed it the most.
4. For being selfish of my time.
5. For being self-centered.
6. For not occasionally checking on you every now and then.
7. For telling you that I’m gay.
8. For blocking you on Facebook.
9. For unfollowing you on Tumblr and Twitter.
10. For finding out that I’ve unfollowed you on all the social networking sites.
11. For making you invisible during our meet-ups.
12. For pretending that everything was alright with us.
13. For not making more effort on our friendship.
14. For everything else.
We’ve been friends for almost 10 years now and I’d hate to see it go down the drain for some stupid reasons that are mostly my fault. It was stupid of me to not care about our friendship. It was stupid of me not to feel bad about what is happening with us. And lastly, it was stupid of me to try to turn things backward and made it look like that this shit was all your fault. I don’t know what to do anymore. We’ve grown distant from each other and we got used to it. We can’t even stay in the same room. I know that you are passive and that you hate confrontations but I can’t just pretend that nothing happened and pretend that everything is alright with us. I need to sort things out. I need to talk to you. But you won’t let me. I can’t blame you. I did some horrible things and I guess you just got tired of my endless b-shits. From where I stand, you are some minute shadow slowly drifting away. I’m just here standing. Doing nothing. Watching as the bridge between us is painstakingly burning.
Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word. Yes, indeed. My charge nurse and I got into a misunderstanding the other day that led us to shout at each other in the nurses’ station for everyone to see and hear. She was angry and I was not in the mood. It was the perfect recipe for disaster. I don’t want to elaborate on the root of the problem but I am definitely sure that both of us are at fault. My heart was beating very fast and my eyes were about to bust into tears. I regretted every action I did. I shouldn’t have fought back. It was very disrespectful of me. I was worried because we were best of friends and I can’t have one silly argument torn that friendship down. After one hour of silence and cooling down, and I got to say that it was a very hard thing to do, I decided to approach her and ask for forgiveness. I shed a little tear. It was so not me. I used to be too proud to ask for forgiveness most especially if I didn’t start the fight. I guess I am growing a little and starting to mature emotionally. I am proud of what I did. Mam Marj, I am truly sorry. :)
I say to the telepath in the room while I continue to think about gay sex in public places.
Everyone told me not to go there to ask for forgiveness because everyone thought it was a bad idea. My co-workers advised me to just avoid that person because my presence might cause him to be more angry than he already is. But I couldn’t bear the thought of avoiding someone I had offended so with cold feet and a frightened spirit, I walked inside the room and ask for forgiveness. He understood my side of the story and accepted my apology. End of the story. :)
Hi! My name is Jim. 24 y.o. I work as an ICU nurse so don't wonder if you'll see medical and nursing related crap in here. I'm also gay, obviously. But I'm not out of the closet just yet. Expect that I'll be posting a lot of men wearing almost close to nothing and doing some weird stuff to each other. This blog site is about me and what I feel. I want to look back and read this site after a few years and see how I progressed as a person. Things that interest me include shoes, the color red, cats, pandas, dogs, cocks (if you know what I mean), musicals, TV, movies, inspiration, F.R.I.E.N.D.S LGBT, and anything that makes me want to take a second look at. My blog is typically not safe for work. Be careful before hitting the follow button. Enjoy.:)
